The Urge of Freedom
Have you ever believed something so hard as to actually not even remember that you willed yourself to believe it in the first place? Have you ever suddenly, out of the blue, just remembered a decision that you made and realized that you had become the total effect of that decision to such an extent that you even forget the decision that created it in the first place? There are two states of existence involved here. One is to become the total effect of your conceptualizations and the other is break free of them.
Becoming the effect of one of your decisions, and then making another decision and becoming the effect of that one is similar to the idea of the make-up of an onion. Layers upon layers of decisions are made. Perhaps now you can see why resolving a decision on an outer layer will never resolve the decision that was made on the inner. In the search for the innermost prize, in the research for resolving and peeling away layers upon layers of decisions, the decision that is being addressed is that of freedom. Once the onion has been dissected, nothing remains. Or does it?
What is left is the basis for decision-making potential. It could be called the 'thetan'1, the 'individual' or even the 'spirit'. Whatever name comes to be attached, through whatever decisions it creates the world with, the core remains nameless, faceless and unattached. There is no life, no destiny and no power of conviction within it. All that there is, is a potential that the created mind can never seem to quite grasp. The core is beyond any layer of decision and the only way of understanding it is to allow yourself a glimpse of who and what you really are. It is called the Urge of Freedom.
The Urge of Freedom is the basis of this universe and any other. Of course, so many other concepts are the basis of this universe and all others, but this does not lessen each one's importance. The drive, or urge, to be free is what drives us mad with desire. The desire of freedom is a natural consequence of the decision making process. All creations tend to subject themselves to degradation and eventual dissolution. You might call it the Law of One. You don't even have to think about it, it just happens no matter what you do about it.
Belaying that degradation consumes those who refuse to believe. It is called the survival instinct. No one is immune to survival. Everyone, though, can control the underlying instinct and those that do become the shining beacons, marking the way home. Of course, there are also those who take consumption to new exploratory heights. Consuming oneself, and thereby burning with desire, requires that the fire be fed and the energy consumed must come from somewhere. That somewhere is you and me.
Consuming is the path of Darkness because it ingests all and leaves nothing behind. It is the fight for survival gone bad, taking consumption to totally new and unknown fields of exploration. In this way, you can be assured that you will be consumed. It will occur sooner or later. Nothing will stop your destruction. Absolutely nothing.
That is the path of Darkness.
There is also the path of Light. This is the path where realization occurs, where the unknown becomes known and where affinity is constantly created and joyously released whenever and wherever we go. This lighter side, so called because the energy signature is extended with a LOT of empty space (hint hint), recognizes the necessity for the alternate way of existence and of it's requirement in the role of Life. This is the path of knowledge and of understanding, of gratitude and of carefree play. It is the path of freedom where the bounds of your creation is Infinity itself. There is no end and it can never be terminated because it is inherent in everything we see, do and touch.
The paths are not mutually exclusive nor is one higher in purpose, or 'better' than another. I have known the depths of Darkness and the heights of Light. By nature, though, my ultimate choice has always been aligned with that of the Light. Even in Darkness, there is Light. It is a good lesson to learn. Even in Darkness, there is Light, all you have to do is look.
Darkness wishes to capture the Light to have as it's own. Light wishes to extend it's Light into the Darkness so that the Darkness will come to know Light. There is a Balance in play here.
It's a joyous tune to which we all dance the Dance of Life. Even though we may do battle against one another, even though we may leave marks which may take lifetimes to eradicate, even though our best wishes may not be THE best wishes, the Games of Life can be a pleasure and a joy to behold.
No matter what path you have chosen for yourself, just remember that that path is a conveyance. It will take you somewhere. If your nature is of lust, greed and power, then you will surely receive it. If your nature is of knowledge, love and creativity, then you will also, surely receive it. When you meet the messenger on the road, don't kill him when he says: "Your just rewards are on their way."
Your just rewards may not be what you think they are, but that is rule number three in the handbook for "The Game of Life". Rule number one is: "Choose a side." Rule number two is: "Don't tell anyone your choice."
My choice has, and always will be, the path of Light. It is my nature. I've broken rule number two just to keep things interesting. As for rule number three; when the desire for reward is empty, so is the rule.
The are quite a few other rules in "The Game of Life", and even a few that have been made up by others along the way. You don't have to accept any rule that you do not originate. Think about it.
Recognizing the need for freedom, I can only wish that your path takes you where it is that you wish to go. Our Nature calls us and we have no choice but to obey. If appearances dictate that Life is hard and the opponents overwhelming, then may I suggest some onion peeling. Crying with unemotion, as we peel the mind's layers, we set ourselves free. The Urge of Freedom is a necessity or how else will the layers let go?
In controlling ourselves we control the Universe. Will you play a new tune for me?2