On the old forum, I had said that I have no Scientology materials in my possession. It's true, because a few years back I sent everything that I had to Mike Hunsaker, the ex-webmaster of fza. He even got a free e-meter. Lovely Christmas gifts!
Well, he did pay $100 for book-rate shipping cross country.
Years ago, I did some auditing with Rey Robles and when I paid for some books and received books I didn't ask for, I knew that I could do better. So I scoured the land in search of books. It's really amazing what turns up when one actually is interested enough to look.
Living in Arizona at the time, I looked high and low from Las Vegas to Phoenix, to numerous small towns in between. I found a ton of books and the prices were absolutely great.
Up in Las Vegas, there was a complete set of green vols, with bound checksheets, sitting on the top of the shelf. The guy was asking $150. I asked him if he could go any cheaper. He said, sure. He said that he was glad to get rid of them. Final cost: $100. What a deal.
I got a great set of tech vols from him too. This guy had all sorts of stuff, and I would buy what seemed reasonable, picking and choosing the books I wanted. I never asked the guy to deal on anything other than the green vols, and was always happy with what I found.
In Flagstaff, I found quite a few books too, even an early edition of Dianetics. What a find! In Phoenix, I found a video tape of LRH giving a talk. I don't recall what the name of the tape was, but the price was great. In another used book store in Phoenix I found a PDC tape set. The people there wanted $300 for the set, which was banged, dented and very dirty. No way, but I thought about the scn shop just down the road a ways and of how those people could come to that bookstore and save a few bucks. Of course, that is not something that would be contemplated - LRH can only speak through brand new, unused material! How sad.
The PDC tape set reminded me of the Study tape set that I bought from Rey. I wonder if it got jammed up in Mike's tape recorder too? Oh well. Some things just aren't made to last.
Good thing that Scientology material floats around the net too. But, like I said, I gave away everything that I had to Mike. There was even a bunch of files that were a recording of CBR's talks. I found those interesting. I was never too keen on listening to LRH's tapes, but CBR's were a different story for me. How fun! I wonder if Mike is still planning on keeping the CBR material that I gave him now that he is associated with FZAOINT and is in alignment with their 'standard tech' line.
The point I am making here is that Scientology material is widely available. It's very easy to get if you really want it and at prices that won't set you back an arm and a leg. I collected a fair amount just on the basis of a games condition. Imagine what could be done if someone were to be really intent on acquiring Scientology data.
There is that 'confidential' aspect to LRH's and CBR's material and at this point in time, I fully agree with the reasons behind those labels. There are valid reasons to wait for the right time to come to understand the right materials. Everything has it's proper order in the time stream. I may not always follow that line in the things that I write about, but I have other reasons for doing so.
The greatest pleasure I get is seeing the results of what happens when someone starts to open their eyes for the first time. The first time could be applicable to any subject or area in life, it doesn't matter. The point is watching understanding radiate out and having that understanding and comprehension spill out into the universe. As far as I am concerned, there is no greater gift because with understanding comes affinity. Affinity creates the closeness which is called OT. When someone comes to be in touch with their environment, it is a lovely, lovely, sight to behold.
I've worked with a few auditors in my time of auditing. I've worked with the CoS, Rey Robles, Marianne Hagen and Geoffrey Filbert. I've worked solo with L. Kin's material, CBR's material and Filbert's material. I've noticed many things along the way about my environment, my attention and myself.
Scientology works when applied correctly and works extremely well but only in proportion to the understanding that the auditor has endowed themselves with. I've mentioned the word 'shallow' and I've also mentioned the word 'deep' before. These are indicators of an auditor's awakened state, whether that auditor is another, or oneself. This is the reason that no matter the depth of book knowledge, it comes down to 'knowing how to know'. If your auditor knows how to know, you will fly like there is no tomorrow because knowing how to know is senior to any piece of Scientology that could ever be created. The goal is to reach beyond the subject itself, not demonstrate the idea of 'having no case' by letting that thought be known. Knowing how to know is not the levels audited through, it is not the memorization of each and every scrap of data in the universe, is it not the number of clients or organizations one can claim. Those are the barriers which are used to remove other barriers. Tools of the trade, not the trade itself.
Knowing how to know means that you embody the entire universe in your thoughts, words and actions. You demonstrate your facets to ends other than the single solitary life unit into which you chose to be born. A Scientology auditor knows that greatness lies in each and every individual and their job is to bring out that greatness and allow it to blossom unencumbered by the auditor's own thoughts and ideas about what 'should be'.
Scientology auditing is the granting of beingness to the most precious thing in the universes - you! Not all auditors do that, but believe me, you will come to know of the difference.
Between auditing and studying, the world around us evolves into something far greater than anything we have ever imagined for ourselves. Creating the reality in which we live is a full time job. :-)
When you do it right, it gets done. Which road would you prefer?
My first experience with auditing was on the HQS course with my twin in the CoS. My twin couldn't audit, the guy's intention reached about as far as his nose. Intention means a lot to me and so I wound up doing all the auditing parts with the full time mission staff auditor. I would audit my twin, but it just didn't work the other way around.
Next, I got hooked into doing the 'Happiness Rundown' which was just coming out as a result of the 'Way to Happiness' pamphlet. That was interesting. At first nothing was happening because there was nothing there for me to audit. Then after a bit of boil off, I dug up all sorts of stuff down the track. This never surprised me or gave me pause because I looked at it like - so what? After a bit that process got completed and away I went on Student Hat. Not too long after it's completion, I got drafted into the SO and away I went to la-la land. What a rip.
When I first when down to big blue, I was covered in poison oak due to my midnight adventures out in the wild lands of California. The adventures were fun, but as I was itching a bit, I saw the medical person down there. This guy certainly didn't look the part, but I took his offering of vitamin C and kept downing it all day long. After a time, the poison oak went away, no big deal.
The first time that I went to the cafeteria I passed a little room on the right, that had a swinging door, table cloths, waiters and all, and thought it interesting. I was told it was restricted. Hush-hush and all that. So I sat at a table, only to be told later that the table where the new recruits are to sit was located elsewhere. Next time, I sat at the exact same table again. The new recruits table was disgusting, I wasn't about to sit there. Well, after being told a few times, I started to feel like I shouldn't make waves, so I duly sat at the worst tables in the cafeteria. Very funny!
During my short stay at big blue, I saw some interesting aspects of the organization and the people of Scientology. Some of the people had wonderful intent and purpose and some had nothing but their own interests in mind. Their actions gave them away each and every time.
One time I heard some music and wound up in some guy's room watching him listen to the music and listening to it myself. It was nice classical music that fit in nicely with the SO concept. A shining light in among the darkness.
My stay with the SO ended after the initial auditing session and the announcement made that I was to go back to the mission and would be ready to come back after the auditing that I would recessive there was completed. They kicked me out! I wonder if I should have gotten that in writing?
It took two people to get me to sign up and some disinterested third party to kick me out. Very funny! What was even funnier was the jerk that I drove down to LA, who came from Palo Alto, was accepted! It was obvious that they were only taking certain types of people. I was definitely not their certain type of person.
Back at the mission, I left short thereafter. Enough was enough.
One of the things that stuck with me during my time at the mission was the declare of David Mayo. For some reason, that declare never made sense to me and I really wondered, at that time, what these people were up to. Actually, I knew that there was no Scientology at home, only the night light.
Years flew by with little exposure or interest in Scientology, until one day, looking through Hank Levin's magazine I saw Rey Robles' ad. Interesting. I called him up and began an auditing relationship that lasted through Power Processing, the L's and who knows what else. There are even a few success stories that I wrote about the L's. Rey was an interesting character and I developed quite the sense of humor because of him. Very funny!
One time during a auditing session I perceived a dark mass that was hanging around to the left side of me. Rey wasn't able to help deal me deal with that and the next thing I know, I'm down on the ground after taking a spill on my motorcycle. I spend the entire next day flat on back literally wiped out. It caused quite a stir in the Misiunas household, I'll tell you that!
But that's all right. Rey accepts barter and I bartered the motorcycle, as well as a very nice telescope to finish up the L's. I even delivered them to his place just outside of Sedona, AZ. Interesting area, btw.
Later, I somehow ran across Marianne Hagen. Funny how things work out. She spent a few days out in front of the house that I was renting in a borrowed RV. We did a few sessions together and the difference in intent was quite noticeable from the previous auditors that I had. There was someone home and the lights were on and as she proceeded with the sessions, I came to see the difference between shallow and deep.
I never saw Marianne again, but was very glad to hear of her move to the US from New Zealand. She is a valuable being to know, with good intent and purpose.
After Marianne I decided to give a go with some solo auditing, and so away I went with L. Kin's version of CBR's material. It was fun running off attached theta, but became boring in short order. One of the things that captured my interest was Black Static Thetans. Interesting creation and exploitation of that aspect of theta.
After a while, I got the urge to locate Geoffrey Filbert and did so. Filbert is one funny man. Bitter, but very funny. He's bitter at the way he was treated in Scientology and I don't blame him. I like Filbert and still think about him every now and then.
We went through the OT levels via his 'Excalibur Revisited' book as well as a few processes that he had created addressing aspects beyond his published book. It was an interesting experience, much of which I seem to have lost. To be honest, I couldn't tell you exactly what we did and I don't even care. It might be best to put it this way: Case was handled.
I'm not an auditor, don't plan on being one and so my attention is not focused along the lines of remembering processes to use or learning techniques to use in the resolution of case. No interest. What I can say is that gpm's had no interest to me, Bt's are a non-interest area and learning the in's and out's of universes don't excite me either. Filbert has a way about him that is for sure and for that I am thankful, but when it comes time to part, it is time to part.
After a bit, I wake up and begin to realize my activity on the other dynamics. Right now I couldn't flick off the names of those dynamics, but I would have no problem in relating to the part of me that actively impinges on whatever name you wish to give to any created dynamic you so choose.
After the auditing period, I decided to try a different approach. Ralph Hilton rose a fuss about proclaiming the 'availability' of the materials on fza.org (for some reason), when I replaced the main page at the site with a 'personal' web page for a bit, which, btw, I thoroughly enjoyed creating. It was a light hearted look at who I really was, but some people who like control obviously felt otherwise.
Once Hilton's ruckus started, I turned over site responsibilities to Mike Hunsaker and left Hilton's 'Free Zone' to explore other avenues. I was not disappointed.
Eastern mysticism fascinated me and I read all sorts of books on the subject. I found a basis upon which Scientology principals rested and came to understand where LRH received many of his ideas and of how he furthered those ideas and brought them into the 21st century. It was amazing.
During this time period of exploration I came to discover numerous areas of spiritual enlightenment that would have been impossible to understand without my grounding in the Scientology religion. I came to realizations that far exceeded anything that I had yet to encounter during any of my Scientology auditing. It was absolutely astounding and time just stood on it's ear for me and danced. Even the name with which I was born with seemed silly and of little consequence. Names, bodies, time, experience, universes, games, you name it, it all took form and shape and definition in a totally new way.
I make no claim to states of being or experience. I've already made that clear. It's true that I've had just enough auditing to be dangerous, but I also consider the amount of auditing that I've received to be a small, almost insignificant, amount. No big deal, but that does not take away from Scientology's effectiveness when applied correctly.
As an initial foray back into the Free Zone, I took the opportunity to reassert my control over FZA when Mike Hunsaker let the fza.org name expire. Revamping the site into a 'community centered' approach, it was resisted by various agents of control. No big deal. I restored the old format and once again left the site to Mike H.
Time passed by and I assumed various identities for various purposes and engaged in discussions on the FZA forum. Through those discussions reality was brought home and realigned with my own inner being. Out of that came a new respect for the REAL Scientology religion and of Marianne Hagen's effects via her 'products'. I use that term in quotes because although she creates OTs, she also creates products through the use and application of the religion of Scientology. There is no mistaking the people that have been touched by her.
Here we are again, with me assuming control of FZA once again. Mike Hunsaker had no use for the fza.org site other than to demonstrate his new found FZAOINT Dissem Sec status and now I could serve multiple purposes through that resumption of control.
Everything that I do is based on intent. The things that I do always have effects on multiple layers. I don't operate on nor give undo attention to any one single dynamic alone. Wrenching control of FZA out of the hands of FZAOINT and it's operatives is similarly based. If you wish to know more of what lies behind my reasoning, read the posts that were made to the old forum under one of my alias', alice, or visit my own personal site sacredcow.org. Some of the data provided through those avenues are old, and I would say that about 85% of what you read has absolutely nothing to do with anything, but if you catch a glimpse of the real data, more power to you.
Here we are at the present day. Reality is how we wish it to be and so it is. Markabians are scattered here and there and electronic controls are haphazardly being employed. Certain things are falling apart and certain other things are creating a new found spiritual urge which can't help but increase through time. Events unfold and experience is absorbed and in the due course of existence, we all come just a little closer to where it is that we really wish to be.
Welcome aboard mate. It's good to see you again.